unicorn overlord is very fun, and very stupid

the mechanics are pure fun. it's an incredibly clever adaptation of the RTS model to console: you can pause at any time while moving your units on the map in order to rethink your strategy, use items, or activate a unit's special skill. when one of your squads encounters an enemy, the standard RPG turn-based combat is replaced with a sort of auto-battler, but the attacks and other abilities each unit uses, when they use them, and who they target with them, can all be specified in an intricate tactics menu that lets you define delightfully complicated flowcharts:

immediately before a battle, you're given a preview of how much damage each side will inflict on the other, and you can reorganize your squad (units are placed on a 2-by-3 grid, with three slots in the front row and three in the back) in order to see how different compositions will affect the outcome. one of the most rewarding parts of the game was gradually refining a composition that could defeat the Tallest Ever Woman in order to convince her to join our army:

i did say this game was stupid, though. if, like me, your only familiarity with Vanillaware is 13 Sentinels, you'll be surprised at how shallow and straightforward the plot is here. you're a prettyboy princeling setting out with his childhood friends to avenge his mother and defeat an evil empire. from that premise, everything goes exactly as you would expect.

what did surprise me was how horny the game could be:

but again, my surprise here was due to 13 Sentinels being my only exposure to Vanillaware. if you look at their older games, this is par for the course. if you look at Dragon's Crown, this is incredibly tame. if for some reason you need a reminder of what it felt like to be a woman in games 10+ years ago, you're welcome (and i'm sorry).

it's hard to describe exactly what makes 'eroticism' (or 'fan-service' or good old fashion horniness) in older games so much more off-putting, by and large, compared to today. but there's a quality to it whereby you can tell that it was designed to titilate a specific subset of male gamers who were the target demographic at the time. now that it's understood that other people also play games, the horniness seems to reflect that; i found Dragon's Crown unpleasant and alienating, whereas the absurd bikini armor in Unicorn Overlord is merely silly.

silliness is also why the paper-thin plot didn't bother me. the gameplay itself is so good and engaging that it didn't matter that there was very little in the narrative that grabbed me (with some notable homosexual exceptions). in between battles you run around, have your horse(?) dig up fish(??) to help rebuild towns(???) ravaged by war, and steal milk from goats.

and honestly what more do you need?